About
23. <3 iaa.
I have the tendency to fuck up when the momentum is good. I pushed away a sotmebody who means the world to me. All because I don’t think I deserve a gift. A birthday gift. From her. Why? Literally because I thought so shallow of myself. Useless and unethical decision to do so. I’ve promised myself to change for the better, and I should’ve allow her to buy me a gift. All I did was decline and try to be humble to a point it became pathetic and sad.
I should be thrilled at an opportunity like this but instead I’m indicating to her that I’m a useless son of a bitch which I know I’m not. So why did I say I didn’t deserve it, why couldn’t I jump on the bandwagon of happiness and let her spoil me? What I did tonight will leave a scar, never again am I getting a privilege like this.
Promising too to myself to never hurt her feelings, I literally squashed her heart. I’m sorry for the mess I made. And now I have to accept the consequences. There’s gonna be this tainted mark on my birthdays years to come. I’m sorry again.
Deadlines approaching for assignments! I miss my girlfriend so much. Come back faster! Hahah
I shouldn’t have walked away
I would’ve stayed if you said
We could have made everything OK
But we just
Threw the blame back and forth
We treated love like a sport
The final blow hit so low
I’m still on the ground
I couldn’t have prepared myself for this fall
Shattered in pieces curled on the floor
Super natural love conquers all
‘Member we used to touch the sky
And
Lightning don’t strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love’s a gift
But we let it drift
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry
Come on babe, can our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon’ make it right
I’m on the edge just trying to survive
As the angels cry
I thought we’d be forever and always
You were serenity
You took away the bad days
Didn’t always treat you right
But it was OK
I did something stupid
And you still stayed with me
But you can only cope for so long
Doing the one you claim to love wrong
Before too much is enough
You look up and find your love gone
And we were so good together
How come we could not wither this storm
And just to better
Why do we say goodbye
‘Cause
Lightning don’t strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
I felt the angels cry
True love’s a gift
We let it drift
In a storm
Now every night
I feel the angels cry
Come on babe, can our love be revived
Bring it back and we gon’ make it right
I’m on the edge just trying to survive
As the angels cry
Baby I’m missin’ you
Don’t allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I’m reaching for you
Baby I’m missin’ you
Don’t allow love to lose
We gotta ride it through
I’m reaching for you
Lightning don’t strike
The same place twice
When you and I said goodbye
Felt the angels cry
True love’s a gift
But we let it slip
In a storm
Every night
I feel the angels cry
Oh babe, don’t let the angels cry
Whenever I’m weary
From the battles that raged in my head
You made sense of madness
When my sanity hangs by a thread
I lose my way, but still you
Seem to understand
Now and Forever,
I will be your man
Sometimes I just hold you
Too caught up in me to see
I’m holding a fortune
That Heaven has given to me
I’ll try to show you
Each and every way I can
Now and Forever,
I will be your man
Now I can rest my worries
And always be sure
That I won’t be alone, anymore
If I’d only known you were there
All the time,
All this time…..
Until the day the ocean
Doesn’t touch the sand
Now and Forever
I will be your man
Now and Forever,
I will be your man..
Its been 3 days since arriving from london and I’m missing it dearly. The girlfriend, the friends, the people, the weather, the place, the culture. Basically, everything. This being my first visit to Uk, I found it easy to adapt. Well eventho it was only for 2 weeks or so but yeah.
My journey got off to a funny start, tried to surprise my gf but it backfired instead. Haha so ended up staying over at emir’s place. His mates were insanely awesome. The next day, le gf came to get me after I revealed to her that I’m in london.
Went to kingston where she studies and stays, its a pretty nice place. Stayed with her throughout most of my time there. It was nice, spending quality time, just us both. Got to celebrate her birthday, valentine’s and our 8th month together. Yeahhh, awesome like that, met up with arif too and his gf. Haha big vietboi.
Oxford street, regent’s street, bond’s street, carnaby street, harrod’s, piccadilly circus, bicester village, eye of london, tower bridge, tower hill, london bridge, newcastle, madame tussauds, big ben were some of the many places I got to visit. But the highlight of it was of course, visiting the Emirates Stadium. That’s right, I have fulfilled my dream as an Arsenal fan. Hehe. Ijat and munjo took the gf and I to the freemason temple at convent garden and weiiii, aku taktau ada freemason temple kat malaysia doh! Twisted!
And the clubbing scene is fantastic, they even have laughing gas! Met up with f, fah and daboi as well. Daboi as usual, always the comedic one when tipsy/drunk. Oh, le gf and I went for wicked as well and it was great! The lighting, singing, acting and everything was top notch.
Got to play football on my supposedly last day there but guess what? I ended up missing the flight. Woopsies. Called me ma and explained everything and had to trouble daboi to pay for my new ticket which departs 2 days after.
But all in all it was a superb fantastic amazingly awesome trip and I’m praying and hoping that I get to do 1 semester there, if not there’s always round 2 for this coming holidays. Oh well, I’m done. Thank you everyone for the lovely experience, and thank you sayang for the amazing time spent with you. =D I love you always.
Wowza, its 2012. One more month before I fly off to uk for hols and to see my sayang. I had the best last day of 2011 and the best of the first day of 2012. She surprised me, and I’ve gotta admit I don’t think I’ll ever top that. But I’ll try. Ehehehe.
Thanks again sayang. For everything. I love you. Looking forward to 2012 with you.
So its been six months. A combination of ups and downs. Ifs, what ifs, coulda, shoulda, woulda. Hopes and expectations. But we made it. We made it this far out. The little things and the big things. Words thrown around, actions executed. But in the end, we pulled through. No rainbows, no butterflies, no unicorns. Just you and me.
I wish some things were done differently, but it is you who always make up for my short comings. Together, we are good. Together we are perfect. I love you to death. Even then, in oblivion, I’ll still love you.
Happy six months.
Always, it is me who ruins everything. Haih, me and my big mouth. For once, I wished I just pinched myself to stop myself from opening my mouth. I’m sorry. So so sorry.
I’m not a big fan of mainstream music, but this song really speaks to me. How I feel and stuff.
It will rain- Bruno Mars
If you ever leave me, baby
Leave some morphine at my door
‘Cause it would take a whole lot of medication
To realize what we used to have
We don’t have it anymore
There’s no religion that can save me
No matter how long my knees are on the floor
So keep in mind all the sacrifices I’m making
To keep you by my side
And keep you from walking out the door
Cause there’ll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby
There’ll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same
If you walk away, everyday it’ll rain-ain-ain-ain-ain-ain
I’ll never be your mother’s favorite
Your daddy can’t even look me in the eyes
If I was in their shoes, I’d be doing the same thing
Saying ‘there goes my little girl, walking with that troublesome guy’
But they’re just afraid of something they can’t understand
Oh, but little darling, watch me change their minds
Yeah for you, I’ll try, I’ll try, I’ll tryy-y-y
I’ll pick up these broken pieces ‘til I’m bleeding
If that’ll make it right
Cause there’ll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby
There’ll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same
If you walk away, everyday it’ll rain-ain-ain-ain-ain-ain
Oh, don’t you say goodbye
Don’t you say goodbye
I’ll pick up these broken pieces ‘til I’m bleeding
If that’ll make it right
Cause there’ll be no sunlight if I lose you, baby.
There’ll be no clear skies if I lose you, baby
Just like the clouds, my eyes will do the same
If you walk away, everyday it’ll rain-ain-ain-ain-ain-ain
Seemed to stop my breath
My head on your chest
Waiting to cave in from
The bottom of my…
Hear your voice again could we dim the sun
And wonder where we’ve been maybe you
And me
So kiss me like you did my heart stopped
Beating such a softer sin
(I’m melting, I’m melting)
In your eyes I lost my place
Could stay a while and I’m melting
In your eyes like my first time
That I caught fire, just stay with me
Lay with me now
Never caught my breath
Every second I’m without you
I’m a mess ever know each other
Trust these words are stones
Why cuts aren’t healing
Learning how to love, I’m melting
In your eyes I lost my place
Could stay a while and I’m melting
In your eyes like my first time
That I caught fire, just stay with me
Lay with me, stay with me, lay with me now
You can stay and watch me fall
And of course I’ll ask for help
Just stay with me now
We could take our heads off
Stay in bed just make love thats all
Just stay with me now
I’m melting, I’m melting
In your eyes I lost my place
Could stay a while and I’m melting
In your eyes like my first time
That I caught fire, just stay with me
Lay with me
In your eyes I lost my place
Could stay a while and I’m melting
In your eyes like my first time
That I caught fire, just stay with me
Lay with me, stay with me, lay with me now
In your eyes lets sleep ‘til the sun burns out
I’m melting in your eyes
